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Monday, May 9, 2011


*S walks into room*

S: Good morn-

I1: Sit down.

*S sits*

I1: So why do you want to become a doctor?

S: I find that doctoring is...emotionally satisfying. *thinks: doctoring = earn lots of $$$ = makes me happy = emotional satisfaction!!*

I2: I see. So tell us, S- have you met with any major failures in life?

S: Uh...no. Not any that I can remember of.

I2: So you're telling us you're perfect?

S: Yes.

*I1, I2 and I3 exchange confused looks. Clearly no one's given them such an answer before. S notices, and cackles inside*

I3: So tell us - what would you like to specialize in next time?

S: Geriatric Medicine!! *thinks: actually, Plastics. But since everyone's going to have to pick up Geriatrics in the future, that technically isn't a lie!*

I3: Mm, noble.

*T2 glances at S's portfolio*

T2: I see you've been in this 'Odyssey of the Mind'. Could you tell us more about it?

S: It's a competition split into two parts- the long term problem and short term problem. The long term problem involves coming up with a play, casting actors and-

T2: Okay let's say a scene in your play were to be staged in the A&E Department of a hospital. Could you tell me some of the roles your actors would have to fill?

*S snickers to himself inwardly- he has been to the SGH A&E ward twice or thrice already during NS. One should always go there because: 1) Faster treatment, 2) The $90+ A&E service charge is covered by MINDEF, 3) Everyone's going to be skeptical when you produce a General Med MC but your MC has 'SGH ACCIDENT AND EMERGENCY' printed on it, the army people are less likely to ask questions.*

S: Triage nurse, temperature-screening nurse, pharmacy nurse, A&E doctor, registration nurse...I think that's it.

T2: So what if three victims of a road crash accident were suddenly wheeled in, all bleeding profusely and in need of major surgery?

S: Then we'd...get the team of A&E surgeons to operate on them.

T2: Oho, so now there's a team of A&E surgeons. I wonder where they came from?

S: Err...same place where your accident victims came from. Hurhurhur...

*T2 glares at S, but T3 interrupts before anything else happens*

T3: So, tell us about your attachment at TTSH. I assume you learnt quite a bit about tuberculosis?

S: Yes.

T3: Right. So how does one test for tuberculosis?

S: Ah, okay. It's called the BCG test. The doctor injects a substance called BCG into a spot in your arm. After a day or so you return so the doctor can check the results of the test. TB or not TB...geddit? Hurhu-

T3: We're looking for doctors, not comedians.

*S falls silent*

T1: Did anyone inspire you to do medicine?

---

'Father Damien' probably wasn't the best answer for the last question. Well, it's over!



And on the bright side if I don't make it in...at least I'll finally be able to answer the 'Have you had any major failures in your life' question! Hurhurhu...nevermind.

6:37 AM

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